Starting the Conversation: When Families Should Talk About Advanced Care Planning
- Felicia Beasley
- Aug 9, 2025
- 1 min read
Talking about advanced care planning with a loved one can feel awkward or scary. But waiting until a health crisis happens often leaves families scrambling to guess what’s “best.” The earlier you start, the more you can focus on love instead of stress. I highly recommend starting the conversation with, "If you couldn't speak for yourself, and you were in the hospital, what would you want?"
When Families Should Start
During family gatherings: Holidays, reunions, or Sunday dinners are natural opportunities.
When health changes: If your loved one is diagnosed with a serious condition or begins to need more help.
When planning other legal documents: Wills, insurance, and estate planning.
Any time it’s on your mind: If you’re thinking about it, it’s time to talk.
Signs It’s Time Now
They’ve been in the hospital more often.
You’re making more medical decisions on their behalf.
They’ve said, “I never want to be kept alive like that” when talking about someone else’s care.
How to Start the Conversation
Choose a calm moment. Avoid high-stress situations.
Use real examples. “I read an article that made me think about…”
Ask open-ended questions. “What matters most to you if you can’t speak for yourself?”
Tip: This is an ongoing conversation, not a one-time checklist. Revisit it as life changes. You know the saying, practice makes perfect! Having an ongoing conversation is the easiest way to make this topic more comfortable to talk about.
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